Pigtails
by CurrentlyIncognito
Summary: Slight crack... Hinata, adopted by the Ataksuki, returns to Konoha after ten years... resulting in a Neiji-in-pigtails-with-a-cute-skull-in-the-end. First attempt at Naruto-humor. Read & review? Hina/Gaara. currently one-shot. :3 - subject to change.


Disclaimer: Not mine. obviously.

The black attire clashed with her pale skin remarkably. Someone really had bad taste when it came to dressing her up. It was clear she didn't dress herself. Or at least, we can hope not. Because that would mean _she_ had bad taste. The general female species in anime are not allowed to have bad taste. It goes against the Laws of Anime.

The collars went all the way to her nose and the sleeves were so long it was almost sweeping the ground. The cloak was nice though, giving her an overall flowing effect. The black ribbon she used to tie up her long slightly blue-ish hair was… interesting to say the least… it had the word 'Death' on it. Her friend gave it to her on her eleventh birthday so if anyone was to insult it, she would be very unhappy indeed (so to say, her eyes would start watering and she would go, 'p-p-please d-don't sa-say t-t-that…')

Either way, the sixteen year old was having a day off today. Her masters even remembered to give her some money this time (the last few times she was allowed out out, she had to hunt down some poor beast for meals… which was an improvement. The first time she was allowed out, she almost starved herself to death.)

This was the first time she came (back) to the leaf village, provided her masters thought it _inappropriate_ to let her return (people might find out she was a hyuga). Her masters are somewhat overly protective of her. Being the only female youth in the group is kind of tough. And for some odd reason, she is still (and always will be) the six-years-old who-fell-into-a-hole-and-can't-get-out in their minds.

She frowned prettily as she inspected the cute decors in the store. There aren't any… skulls… or blood… or the word 'death' in any of the key chains. _Odd, _she thought to herself. There _were_ poor little animals chained to rings though. She sighed, savoring the peacefulness.

'Sasuke-teme!!' she flinched.

'Shut up, Naruto,' in a bored but somewhat familiar voice. She couldn't help putting down the skeletal keychain she was inspecting (the storekeeper could have sworn it didn't belong in his store!) and find out what the commotion was about.

A blond haired boy and a raven haired one was standing half a meter apart. The blond haired teenager (the loud one) poked the familiar one on the chest (he was way too skinny), 'Tsunade-sama ORDERED YOU TO STAY IN YOUR ROOM!'

She wondered vaguely why 'Tsunade-sama' wasn't pronounced in capital letters.

'Calm down, Naruto,' a pink (Her eyes couldn't help twitching. _Pink?) _haired beauty interjected, pulling Naruto back by his arms. 'Now, let's go get something to eat. I'm starving.' She was obviously trying to _lighten up to mood_ – Tobi's job usually, but sometimes she helps too. But her masters say that she didn't have to. They like lapsing into depression…

The pink hair shinobi caught her eyes unintentionally as she tried to drag Naruto away. She stopped.

'Sakuran-chan, what's wrong?' the raven haired guy was standing in a position ready to fight.

'Do I know you?' she asked the poor somewhat pupil-less stranger.

'I don't think so,' she whispered, frowning. _I remember you, _she thought to herself, _you're the doctor. I had you working overtime on my last mission. _

'You're a Hyuga,' he sounded accusing for some reason.

'No, I'm not,' and she sounded defensive.

'Then what's your name?'

'…' she blushed, 'Hyuga, Hinata.'

'See, Hyuga!' triumphant. He looked awfully familiar.

Then she remembered, 'Itachi-kun,' she whispered.

The smirk dropped off his face in a millisecond, 'what did you just call me?'

She shook herself mentally, 'nothing.'

'Where're you from?' happy, happy voice. Her eyes twitched involuntarily again. That much mirth is forbidden in the compounds. He should be punished.

'The North,' she lied smoothly, smiling.

'Why are you here?' accusing. _Itachi-kun has better manners, _she thought to herself.

'It is none of your concern,' two can play this game.

'Hinata-chan, want to join us for breakfast?' she had the strong urge to clap her hands over her ears to protect them from the –to her- unprecedented sound waves. That boy only talks in capital letters.

She had better things to do than to hang around with a loud jock, an obnoxious jerk and a _pink_ girl. Like… like… _something!_ She sighed, 'sure.'

'So.' He stuffed his mouth with ramen before continuing, 'hos lonst ur vesksatsions?'

She frowned. Prettily, Sasuke might add. Sasuke-teme hated her already. When you frown, you're supposed to get uglier. Not prettier. He did notice her discreetly edge her ramen away from Naruto though. Smart gal…

'How long's your vacation?' Sakura translation without looking up, 'Naruto,' she sighed audibly, 'Swallow. Then talk. Not the other way round.' She shook her head hopelessly.

'A week,' she smiled happily to herself.

'So, what're you doing in the North, _Hyuga_?' she found that she didn't like him either. The ramen's good though. She made a note to get the recipe.

'I live there with my mas- my family.'

'A bunch of Hyugas?' he wrinkled his nose.

Prettily, Hinata thought. They do look alike. She giggled despite herself.

Sakura frowned, 'Sasuke… Don't be so rude. Not everyone's like Hanabi, you know.' She leant in to Hinata and whispered, 'we had to babysit her a few times. Sasuke had some bad memories.'

'Hn.'

_Babysitting. _Hinata hated babysitting. Her masters usually let her do the babysitting (because they're lazy. And lets face it, Akatsuki do not _babysit._). Generally, she's not supposed to let them die. All those whimpering and sniveling and '_pleasedon'tkillme_'s. She usually gave them five hours before they tire and go to sleep. Then she had to force feed them. Or else, starve them, then let them beg for food, _then_ feed them. Much less trouble. But that one's a bit risky, so most of the time she just stuffed a bun in their mouths. Shut them up, and feed them at the same time.

She shivered at the memories, 'I understand…'

'Hyugas usually wear white, don't they?' Naruto frowned, eyeing his sadly dressed new friend.

'I'm not a Hyuga. My father disowned me,' she grinned, as if it was the best thing that had ever happened to her.

'Oh… I'm sorry to hear that,' she sounded sad for her new friend.

'Hn.' Which probably meant, 'good for you.'

'Those Hyugas are a bunch of idiots. Don't worry about it, Hinata-chan!' he smacked her back heartily, causing her to cough out the contents of her mouth back into her bowl.

Blood rose to her cheeks in her embarrassment, 'I-I-I'm s-s-sorry.'

'Who are exactly you referring to as idiots, Naruto?' threatening. Hinata picked up her chopsticks, ready to poke the attacker's eyes out.

Neiji walked – I'm sorry, I meant _waltzed_ – into the infamous ramen store with his team (but they're not important – at the moment).

'You…' Hinata started as she saw him clearly.

Neiji stood in fighting stance, ready to fight off his opponent.

'You…' she repeated, 'Y-you have the prettiest hair!' she squealed, pulling him in by his hands. Tenten fumed silently.

'OOH! THE POWER OF YOUTH!!' Lee exclaimed happily as Neiji's hair is being braided into a lovely… pigtail. Superspeed. She tied the end of the pigtail with the miserable ribbons that he had on previously, ending with a cute skull. (I know it's not possible to do that but this _is _my fanfiction. I can twist the ribbon into a miniature version of Kakashi if I wanted to. But that would be illogical. Now, a skull on the other hand…)

He sat, momentarily numbed by the newcomer's sudden outburst.

Sasuke smirked.

Sakura held in giggles.

Naruto banged his hands on the table, laughing loudly.

'NEIJI'S HAIR IS BEING BRAIDED INTO PIGTAILS!!!!' he shouted to Konoha, stomping his feet. 'PIG TAILLLLSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'

Blood rose to his face as the said teenager registered the words, 'I'll kill you!' shouted the normally composed Hyuga (in pigtails), tackling Naruto onto the ground.

'I can't believe you just did that to Neiji,' Ten Ten whispered, crossing her arms. A blush crept onto her face, 'I've been wanting to do that ever since I saw him.'

'Really?' Sakura gasped, 'Me too!'

'SAME HERE!!' Lee shouted happily.

Everyone stopped what they were doing and stared at the green-ish… thing.

Neiji, at this moment, realized how foolish he was being and stood up, trying to regain his pompous composure (but failing miserably, I might add. You'll see why…)

'Who are you?' Neiji-in-pigtails-with-a-cute-skull-in-the-end asked the newcomer.

She squealed, 'you're so _cute!'_ She couldn't help it. Last she saw her cousin, he was two feet tall with an overlarge head.

He took a cautious step back. 'Cute' is not a work commonly associated with a Hyuga. Deadly, yes. Superior, yes. Intelligent, yes. Gorgeous, definitely. But _cute_? He felt insulted.

'Neiji, this is Hinata _Hyuga, _from the North.' Sakura helped, seeing the teenager in distress.

Neiji-in-pigtails-with-a-cute-skull-in-the-end frowned, 'Hinata-sama?'

'Just Hinata,' she frowned, 'maybe I should try a French twist…'

Neiji-in-pigtails-with-a-cute-skull-in-the-end backed away from her slowly…

Sasuke's smirk got wider.

'I'll hold him down…' Sakura suggested helpfully, smirking alongside Sasuke.

Neiji-in-pigtails-with-a-cute-skull-in-the-end-soon-to-be-an-elegant-french-twist shot her a look of pure terror. He fleetingly thought of activating his bloodline limit, then decided against it. He focused his attention back at Hinata, 'b-b-b (I think blame the stuttering in genetics) but you're dead. Hiasi-sama said so himself! You fell into the 'Pit of No Return' (I just made this up) and died ten years ago!'

'I didn't fall into the 'Pit of No Return'!' she stated bluntly.

'You didn't?' Neiji-in-pigtails-with-a-cute-skull-in-the-end-soon-to-be-an-elegant-french-twist asked, frowning.

'Of course not,' she sounded reproachful.

'You didn't?' Neiji-in-pigtails-with-a-cute-skull-in-the-end-soon-to-be-an-elegant-french-twist repeated… stupidly.

'Hiasi pushed me!'

'Wow! That's extreme. You're his daughter!' Naruto shouted, looking bewildered.

'Well, he sort of went, "I do not know what I am to do with you…' she heaved a sigh, apparently imitating her father, 'then, "I need some fresh air. Move aside…" and pushed me into the Pit of No Return.'

'…'

Naruto burst into laughter and continued banging his fist on the tortured table.

Neiji looked like his world had just fallen apart. His eyes rolled up, he stared at the ceiling and counted to ten over and over again under his breath. Ten Ten was patting his arm lightly, hiding a smirk masterfully.

Lee just gawped incredulously.

Sakura didn't know whether to laugh or to look pitying.

Sasuke created a might've just pulled the muscles of his face to it's limit with the world's biggest smirk.

She frowned, confused, 'I'm sorry… did I say something wrong?'

'Umm… No, Hinata. Just, that was rather…'

'IT WAS FUNNY AS HELL!!!' from you-know-who amidst sprays of ramen.

'Hinata.'

Her head shot to the source of the voice in nanoseconds. The store was silenced at his arrival.

'What are you doing here?'

She smiled timidly, walking up to the crimson haired hokage, 'I'm on vacation.'

He frowned.

She giggled. That frown meant 'if you're on vacation, why aren't you spending it with me'. He was pouting, ever so discreetly.

'I went to your place. They said you were busy,' she explained.

'Who said that?' He might as well have added a 'I'll deal with him when I get back.'

She giggled again.

He sighed, 'I have a meeting with the hokage now.'(Which would translate into, 'I'll get back to you as soon as I'm done, so wait for me somewhere.')

'See you later,' she waved him away.

He turned to walk out of the store.

Then stopped.

He frowned.

And turned back

He stared at Neiji…

His eyebrows raised in mild amusement.

'Pigtails?'

Note: this is the result of too many fanfictions and too many pages of chemistry (a subject i detest to the very core). I'll only continue... if i can enough reviews i suppose. So review people!!


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